Thanksgiving has always been my favorite holiday, and I usually host in our home because of it.  So, when our son was in Guatemala in November 2023, I was dreading what Thanksgiving would look like without him here.  The family traditions that we have reserved for this special holiday like making our own butter, eating homemade pumpkin bread while we watch the Macy’s Day Parade, and serving family recipes that have been passed down through the generations would have one less loved one to share them with, and I was a mess just thinking about it.

Autumn has always been my preferred season with the cooler weather, the beautifully colored leaves on the trees, and sweaters a plenty.  My husband would tell you that I have a slight obsession with Fall decorations.  Typically, I have pumpkins in every room with a decorated mantle full of lit leaves and a front porch overflowing with gourds.  However, with Nick being away, I barely put anything out.  My heart just wasn’t in it.  I was not looking forward to this season without him, so why bother putting out anything festive?

The advice I was given by other parents whose kids were away over the holidays was to change things up a bit and make some new traditions.  That way, we wouldn’t miss Nick as much if we weren’t doing what we usually would do with him in our home.  So, we did just that.  We invited other friends over to share our Thanksgiving with us.  The noise and activity would be a good distraction from thinking about Nick too much.  Hosting preparations comes with its own busyness, which was also a great diversion.  I cooked until I was blue in the face.  My daughter and I came up with Minute-To-Win-It games to play.  We deep-fried a turkey and had our guests bring chicken wings to dunk in the oil, and then voted on the best-tasting wings.  Everything was going smashingly well until….

Nick called.  He face-timed us so he could say “Happy Thanksgiving.”  I took one look at his handsome smile and almost lost it right there on the phone.  He told me he had been watching the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade and it made him homesick.  My heart hurt, but also swelled at the thought that he was thinking of home and missing the traditions of our Thanksgivings through the years.  As mothers, we try so hard to make every holiday, birthday, anniversary, etc., special.  Nick telling us he missed spending this holiday in our home with his people was confirmation that it mattered.  It mattered that I put in so much effort into making Thanksgivings special.  That the food we cook for days on end, the family and friends gathered around our table year in and year out, and the laughter and love full of gratitude is all worth it.  Even though Nick wasn’t home with us, he had our home in his heart.  He was thinking of us. 

He won’t be home with us again this Thanksgiving, and even though this makes me sad, I know he will hold the memories of this holiday close.  My prayer is that when he starts his own family, perhaps he will cook some of our favorite family recipes with his wife and children.  Maybe he will continue the tradition of making butter and pumpkin bread, and still want to watch the parade.  He will gather the people closest to him around his table and tell stories of past Thanksgivings and the love that flooded our home.  When we are long gone, traditions continue.  It is part of our legacy.  So, moms, keep ahold of them.  It is a way to still be present through our grown children, grandchildren, and beyond. 

Thanksgiving is a time of reflection and gratitude.  To be appreciative of God’s love and all that He has blessed us with.  I am especially grateful for family and the love passed down through the generations.  Of those no longer with us, but whose traditions still carry on year after year.  It can also, however, be a season of melancholy and pangs of sadness as we miss what once was.  When our children were little.  When we were younger.  When our loved ones were still alive.  It makes us realize the shortness of life and how special it is.  So, this year, let’s not take any of it for granted.  Love hard and love fiercely.  And, always, be grateful.